Interesting Psychology of Relationships Facts
Introduction to the psychology of relationships
According to anthropologists and psychologists, several scientific reasons unlock the answers to the phenomenon of love. It is not as easy as poets and musicians would like people to believe; there is sufficient reason to think it is a little more complicated to understand. After finding some scientific facts and the psychology of relationships, some rather exciting facts came out.
Love is not a special feeling.
In the psychology of relationships, love is not just one feeling that an individual goes through. Instead, love is a sum of three different feelings rolled into one. Helen Fisher, a celebrated biological anthropologist, and her team provided data from her research showing how love is an amalgamation of the feelings of attachment and a sense of attraction and lust. These feelings individually have very specific hormones generated from the brain.
There is a considerable difference between love and lust.
Reproduction is a primary reason for the feeling of lust. This is an evolutionary notion. When considering the hormones for lust, it is necessary to understand that these stem from testosterone and the oestrogen hormone, which are largely responsible for the feeling of lust. Lust separated from the feelings of attachment and attraction makes it easier to understand why love differs from lust. One could understand passion; a one-night stand does not indicate love but happens mainly due to lust. However, it is not that simple to demarcate the two, as it would appear that passion and lust are responsible for the setting in of the feeling of love.
Attraction and Obsession
Testosterone and oestrogen are primarily responsible for the feeling of lust. At the same time, hormones responsible for attraction are norepinephrine and dopamine. Once released, they lead to attraction towards someone. Fisher’s account of the same has led to a broad understanding of how there is an overlap of the brain functions that typically generate the “reward” behaviour. This area has seen much research showing how these areas light up in the brain scans when the subjects are near those they feel attracted to. This explains a couple of things. One feels rather exhilarated in the initial days but gets cleared up because attraction is mostly based on obsession.
The notion of attachment
While discussing the third component of love, i.e. the feelings of attachment, it is necessary to completely understand the idea of nurturing and comfort, which is quite different compared to desire or infatuation. When talking about the hormones responsible for the feelings of attachment, vasopressin and oxytocin feature predominantly. Attachment is in no way exclusive, only to romantic love. Other relations like parent and child or how pet-owners feel for their pets have a certain sense of attachment.
Love could result in loss of appetite.
The feelings of love would naturally lead to the release of hormones like norepinephrine and dopamine. The latter is known to cultivate happiness in the individual. These hormones result in feeling euphoric and giddy. This further results in loss of appetite or could make someone lose sleep or suffer from temporary insomnia.
Love could bring about a definitive change in you.
In the psychology of relationships, changes in terms of preference for specific genres of music or liking cuisines that were not your favourite to begin with could be because you have fallen in love and, therefore, your partner is the reason for such changes. An exciting study in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology suggests that individuals have undergone definitive preferences, choices, and even personality changes after getting into psychology in relationships. There is an increased sense of self-esteem after having developed feelings of love.
Love is capable of effectively alleviating pain.
The Stanford University School of Medicine revealed some reports that love works like a drug and a pain reliever in some cases. They conducted this study on fifteen students from the UG course; one alternatively showed them images of their partners, whom they were romantically inclined towards, and one of their acquaintances. The researchers inflicted mild pain on them with the help of a thermal stimulator. Looking at their crushes or lovers felt a little less painful.
Love could also make you fall ill.
Cortisol levels could be high while in love, primarily because of stress. It typically knocks down the immunity of the individual. Thus, if someone were to get ‘lovesick’, it is understood that the raised cortisol levels would not be capable of causing a physical injury. Still, it bogs down the immunity leaving the individual helpless and falling prey to sickness, as suggested by the studies conducted by Richard Schwartz, associate professor at the Harvard Medical School.
Gratitude could be influential in the development of good psychology of relationships.
Being appreciated and cared for is delightful for most people. Being grateful could, therefore, help improve psychology in relationships. The expression of gratitude helps have a positive outlook for each other in a relationship, further fostering comfort and openness in the long run.
There is some truth in the expression “love is blind.”
Couples therapists, who have been married to each other for a long time, Richard Schwartz and Jacqueline Olds, are also Medical School Professors from Harvard. The latter have deliberated on the evolutionary processes of love for a long time. In a study conducted by them, Schwartz puts forth how there is a deactivation of the neural pathway when there is a feeling of love, which reigns supreme over negative feelings and emotions ranging from social judgment to fear. To critically judge and evaluate things, one should not block these pathways.
Chocolate and the ‘love drug.’
The brain releases phenylethylamine, a hormone found when someone falls in love. This hormone is why one ultimately falls in love with someone. This substance is also present in chocolate. This could be why it becomes difficult for people to stop after a single bite of the chocolate and keep craving more.
Love at first sight
Scientists will have you believe that it does not take much time to be in love with someone. It can take as little as a fifth of a second for someone to fall for someone. The Journal of Sexual Medicine supported this judgement.
Brain signals are felt in different areas when a person is in love.
Twelve specific areas in the brain collectively produce chemicals that give an individual a sense of euphoria and make it seem like they have fallen in love. Some of these chemicals are oxytocin, dopamine, vasopressin and adrenaline. The latter especially sheds light on why someone would feel euphoric and high during those times.
Love gets one ‘high.’
Love is often said to affect individuals, which is similar to that of many drugs. It could also make someone feel like they are high. There is supporting evidence found in the study published in Frontier Psychology, which shows a remarkable similarity between the brain of an individual who is in love and that of an individual who has had an intake of a drug like cocaine. There is also reason to believe that several symptoms are similar when one takes drugs. These include feelings of euphoria, withdrawal and craving.
It is not the heart that falls in love; rather, it is the brain.
There has been a long-standing debate on whether the brain or the heart falls in love. Stephanie Ortigue, a professor at Syracuse University, firmly believes that the brain is the organ responsible for it. Although, the heart is not completely functioning in this situation. There is an activation in specific brain areas when a person is in love, further stimulating the heart. This is also responsible for how a person in love feels when they say it’s like there are butterflies in the stomach. Often believed to be generated from the heart, such sensations are from the brain.
Love makes one dumb.
When someone falls in love, they could participate in something embarrassing or questionable. Studies show that in the case of lust, specific areas in the brain are not functioning. To this end, self-awareness or rational thinking is often not present when a person is in love. The prefrontal cortex is not open, resulting in rash behaviour and decisions without proper thought.
The love hormone could be tricky.
Oxytocin, released when someone is in love, is responsible for the feelings like warmth, social bonding etc. However, there is a negative side to it too. Oxytocin is also capable of causing emotional pain since oxytocin enhances memory, which aids in retaining the unkind and bad ones, allowing the bad memories to reminisce long after they occurred. While on the goods days, this allows for a healthy relationship between people in love. However, it could also lead to feelings of irritation and jealousy between the duo on the downside.
Love can cause feelings of hurt.
A broken heart is also called “Takotsubo Cardiomyopathy”. There is a fall in the strength of blood pumping in the heart’s chamber. This happens because of a lot of physical or emotional stress, which could be caused by losing someone. One peculiar aspect that needs further unravelling is that it happens almost only with women. This discovery suggests that someone can die because they got heartbroken.
Love is possible at all ages.
The popular belief is that the passionate phase of the marriage is the honeymoon phase. Studies show that the phase can come earlier or later, despite all the social situations and conditions. Stony Brook University’s studies have shown how brain scans of married couples, those within a decade of marriage, and those much older show similar results. The dopamine amounts created and found in the scans also suggest the same.
There is the synchronization of heartbeats.
Studies have found that the duo’s hearts may be in sync if someone is deeply in love. This might primarily stem from the fact that there are physiological signals between two people who are in love.
