Autism and art: David Downes story
My art was my voice, but a family was my dream
From the tender age of two, David Downes found expression through drawing. While his verbal skills lagged behind, his hand crafted intricate images, communicating what words could not. Years later, he would receive an autism diagnosis, but even as a child, his unique way of seeing the world was evident. "It's clear to me now, even if no one recognized it then," he reflects, now a 51-year-old landscape artist residing in Manningtree, Essex.
David's mind functions like a camera, a trait linked to some individuals on the autism spectrum. It allows him to capture places he's visited with stunning precision, replicating them on the canvas from memory alone. "I'm lucky in that way. I can not only picture things clearly, but I become obsessed with the minute details. It used to be churches, the intricate branches of trees, the movement of a flock of birds – anything that sparked my fascination."
Yet, his autistic traits presented challenges too. Feeling isolated from his peers throughout his childhood in Brome, Suffolk, he endured painful bullying during his school years. His artistic talent became a kind of refuge, his intricate drawings filling the pages of private diaries. Sadly, the very skill that gave him solace was dismissed by his teachers, who doubted the authenticity of his work.
From Struggles to Triumph at the Royal College of Art
His mother, who he remembers as his greatest source of support before her recent passing, was the one who saw his potential. With her encouragement, he found his way into the world of art school. However, traditional learning proved difficult. His struggles with retaining information for examinations nearly cost him a spot at the highly-regarded Norwich Art School. Instead, he found his artistic footing in Ipswich, though even there, he struggled. "I excelled at drawing from my own mind, but mimicking what was in front of me was a real obstacle."
Undeterred, David went on to study illustration at Anglia Ruskin University in Cambridge, later earning a postgraduate diploma in similar studies at Brighton University. However, the social difficulties persisted. "In art school, you want to stand out, but I was so different it became alienating. I wanted connection, a girlfriend, those normal experiences, but they eluded me," he admits.
Still without a formal autism diagnosis, David harbored a growing suspicion about his neurological differences. In an effort to understand himself better, he embarked on a visual autobiography project. The stark honesty of this work ultimately opened the door to a life-changing opportunity – acceptance into the prestigious Royal College of Art in London. He remembers the moment as "a dream come true."
A world-class talent, but an outsider at heart
Despite his hard-fought acceptance into the Royal College of Art, David still felt a sense of not quite belonging. His talent was undeniable, yet he found himself gravitating towards fine art rather than the more commercial realm of illustration. "After graduating from such a prestigious institution, there's this expectation you'll know your path, that you'll just 'make it'," he explains. "For me, it was murkier."
His first major break presented an exciting contradiction. Tasked with documenting the most significant BBC buildings at the turn of the millennium, he became the corporation's artist in residence for a period of two years. This high-profile commission cemented his status, but still left him wrestling with his artistic identity.
Navigating Life’s Canvas: David’s Journey Toward Self-Acceptance
It wasn't until his early thirties that David finally received a formal diagnosis of autism. Seeking support, he consulted with a counselor who understood neurodiversity. This guidance, combined with newfound self-awareness, helped him secure part-time employment in an art supply store. "My focus had always been on making a living from my art, but I desperately needed some routine and a greater understanding of how my mind worked."
Things began to take a positive turn professionally. In 2012, a commission from the iconic Savoy Hotel in London led to a piece celebrating the Thames Diamond Jubilee Pageant. This work still graces the hotel's entrance today, a testament to his growing recognition. Additionally, David immersed himself in the work of the National Autistic Society, becoming a vice president and utilizing his talent at fundraising events by painting live.
Yet, a deep personal longing remained. The dream of becoming a father felt increasingly unattainable. His attempts at online dating yielded only disappointment, leaving him feeling more isolated than ever. In his early forties, David turned to hypnotherapy, trading drawings for sessions. "The idea was to reframe those negative thoughts. My hypnotherapist would consistently reinforce that I was not only a great artist, but someone worthy of love, of finding a partner who would accept me as I am."
From Stoke Newington to Manningtree
It was in an unassuming pub in London's Stoke Newington neighborhood that David's life took an unexpected turn. Here, he met Rachel. The couple found a shared passion for California, relocating there for three years. "It was daunting, starting over artistically in a place where I was unknown, but it also freed me from certain expectations," he notes.
The decision to return to England, specifically Manningtree, coincided with Rachel becoming pregnant with their daughter, Talia, now a spirited two-year-old. Living through the global pandemic presented immense challenges, but it also inspired a shift in David's work. "Historically, I've documented what I see. The pandemic forced me inward, and it sparked a fascination with the imaginary, the surreal," he explains.
With renewed confidence alongside a blossoming family life, David made another dream a reality by opening his own gallery in Manningtree. "I never quite believed it would happen, but to see my work displayed, and connect directly with people who respond to it... it's given me a sense of artistic purpose like never before."
A time of crisis, a shift in perspective
While David finds joy in fatherhood and artistic recognition, the current cost-of-living crisis looms large. He's determined to grapple with this urgent issue through his art. "I've always felt a responsibility to create work that reflects the times we live in," he explains. "It's how I process the world, and hopefully, offer some insight for others."
Reflecting on his life's journey, David expresses both gratitude and a touch of wistfulness. "Before my mum died, she told me something that stuck with me. She said, ‘your father and I never imagined you'd settle down and have a family’," he reveals, his voice softening. While he's immensely proud of his artistic achievements, the simple joys of being a husband and father hold profound meaning.
David's autism remains central to his lived experience, impacting both his creative process and his perception of the world. There's still a sense of being different, even within artistic circles. "The art world can be surprisingly rigid, with its trends and expectations," he observes. "My neurodivergent brain doesn't always work that way."
One of the positive aspects of his autistic perspective is the ability to hyperfocus. Whereas some artists may be easily distracted, David finds solace in the intensity of his concentration when immersed in his work. "I can easily spend hours, sometimes entire days, completely absorbed in a painting," he admits, explaining how this allows him to achieve near-obsessive detail in his landscapes.
However, daily life doesn't always accommodate these intense creative periods. Finding a sense of balance is something David actively works toward. "Fatherhood has taught me a different kind of focus. Talia keeps me grounded, present, and constantly learning," he shares, a hint of amusement in his voice.
Embracing Uniqueness
Looking back, he recognizes how the challenges associated with autism have shaped him. "Social situations can still be stressful at times. I process things differently, and sometimes misunderstand intentions," he admits. Yet, he believes these obstacles fueled his drive and made him a more resilient person.
Support from his partner, Rachel, has been crucial in recent years. "She knows how my mind works, and she never tries to change me. She accepts, even celebrates the unique way I see things," David says thoughtfully. This unwavering support has nurtured both his sense of self and his artistic endeavors.
Recently, David has experimented with more collaborative projects, seeking broader connections within the artistic community. He's been involved with local art trails, where multiple artists showcase their work in various locations around a town or village. "It gets me out of my comfort zone. I'm learning to interact with the public in real-time, explaining my process... it's surprisingly rewarding," he confides.
David acknowledges that a touch of that early childhood isolation lingers. Yet, it's now counterbalanced by a sense of contentment and genuine pride. "Am I different? Absolutely. But my difference gave me my art, and my art led me to the family I never thought I'd have."
A future of creativity, uncertainty, and enduring hope
While David's artistic practice offers a sense of stability, he's not immune to the anxieties many currently face. Rising costs, particularly for materials, threaten the financial viability of maintaining a successful art career. "There's this constant tension between staying true to your vision and needing to pay the bills," he remarks, a hint of frustration in his tone.
To combat this uncertainty, he's explored new avenues for income generation. Teaching workshops has been a surprising revelation. While his own learning style clashed with traditional education, he finds a unique satisfaction in guiding others. "There's always a student or two who seem different, who don't quite fit the mold. I take extra care with them, knowing that a few words of encouragement might make all the difference," he shares.
Commissioned Work
Another source of both income and inspiration has been commissions. While these come with specific expectations from clients, David recognizes that they also help stretch his creative muscles. "Sometimes, a commission will take me in a direction I wouldn't have explored on my own. And often, the outcome will then influence my more personal work," he explains.
Despite the practical challenges, David hasn't lost sight of the big picture. "Art has the power to shift perspectives, to evoke empathy, to inspire action. That's especially true with issues like the cost-of-living crisis. I feel a duty to use my talent to highlight what so many are going through." The determination in his voice speaks to a sense of artistic responsibility he takes seriously.
Social media has become a tool, albeit one he has a rather love-hate relationship with. "The potential for connection with an audience is amazing. Yet, it's also easy to fall into the comparison trap, which can be toxic for anyone but particularly for those who already feel like they don't quite belong," he says, acknowledging the double-edged sword of the digital world.
The Joy of being a Family
While his professional life has seen ups and downs, the simple joys of family life with Rachel and Talia serve as an anchor. "Talia is fascinated by the whole painting process. She loves getting messy in the studio and making her own 'masterpieces'," he says, a smile spreading across his face. He even credits her with inspiring him to become bolder with color in his own work.
The future, as for so many artists, remains a delicate balancing act between passion and practicality. Yet, David appears more grounded, even optimistic, about whatever lies ahead. "I suppose the biggest lesson autism taught me is persistence. You might not understand why you're different, but you learn to value that difference and use it to your advantage".
As his story reveals, talent alone doesn't guarantee success or fulfilment. His path has been defined by unwavering persistence, a reimagining of obstacles into catalysts for growth, and the eventual hard-won discovery of family and belonging.
Finding his place in the landscape of life
For David Downes, the journey thus far has mirrored the unpredictable yet captivating nature of his landscape paintings. There have been peaks of recognition, valleys of uncertainty, and unexpected twists and turns that defied expectation. Above all, there's an enduring sense of resilience woven into both his art and his life.
Reflecting on his childhood obsession with detail, he admits to a greater willingness to embrace the imperfect now. "There's still that part of me that craves precision, but I'm learning to loosen up, to let a bit of the unknown onto the canvas," he explains. This newfound flexibility translates to his life beyond art as well.
While autism will always be an essential aspect of his identity, it no longer feels quite so isolating. He's found community among artists with similar experiences and is committed to breaking down stereotypes about neurodiversity. "I want to show that autism doesn't mean you can't connect, can't find love or create a meaningful life," he says with conviction.
The artistic landscape shifts rapidly, with trends emerging and fading seemingly overnight. David remains focused on his unique voice rather than chasing what might be popular at any given moment. "I learned early on that trying to copy others was a dead end for me. I have to create what's authentically mine," he states.
Exploring New Horizons: David’s Artistic Evolution
Despite the allure of London's bustling art scene, David finds profound contentment in the relative tranquility of Manningtree, a place rooted in both history and natural beauty. The surrounding Essex landscape provides endless inspiration, while the slower pace allows him to balance his artistic work with his greatest masterpiece – the vibrant, loving family he's created with Rachel.
"Talia is changing so quickly. I never want to miss a moment," he shares with a tenderness that underscores the joy fatherhood brings. He recognizes that his unique perspective as an autistic father might present occasional challenges but is equally convinced that it offers certain advantages.
One such advantage is the ability to view the world through Talia's eyes with wonder and a touch of the unexpected. "Her little mind is so open, so free of the anxieties we adults carry around. It reminds me to stay curious, to take nothing for granted," he muses.
David Downes may not have followed a conventional path, either personally or artistically. Yet, his journey reveals the power of embracing neurodiversity, the importance of persistence, and the simple truth that some of life's most precious rewards come when we least expect them. His art, a testament to his unique way of seeing the world, offers a glimpse into the remarkable mind of an autistic artist who carved his own place in a world that didn't always understand him.
